Trish’s Chaotic Predictions: Bills vs. Steelers

Another week, and the Buffalo Bills are back home. It’s gonna be a fun one. I see all the discourse online, I’ve seen the posters, I’ve even seen some eager folks getting the BBQ ready. Game time in Buffalo is always a big event, and what’s even more fun is that this is sure to be a blowout.

Yes, I said it. I was conservative with the Titans game, being absolutely certain it would be a trap. But the Bills in front of a home crowd? “C’mon son!”

1.) Von and the Gang are excellent hosts, welcoming Kenny Pickett to the NFL

It makes me sad that Money “Titties Loving” Mitch is officially benched. He deserved better in my opinion. He’s a good QB, they just don’t use him in the right scheme. Oh well, at least he’ll be back on the Bills next year.

In any case, Ed Oliver is (supposed to be) back and I, for one, cannot wait to see a fully healthy defensive line back in action. Kenny Pickett however, may not be so grateful. He’s shown a clear dislike of being crowded in the pocket, and the Bills are known for making the QB uncomfortable. So, expect to see Pickett overwhelmed and maybe even sacked a couple times.

2.) Poyer gets closer to securing that bag

I’m not talking about the contract (sorry Rachel Bush), I’m talking about the deal he made with Pat McAfee. That’s a lot of dough to whatever charity he chooses. And with Kenny throwing three picks in his second half appearance last week, this is the time for All-Pro Po to get a head start on the count.

I love Tre’Davious White, but I don’t see any reason for the Bills to bring him back for a rookie QB and an offence that just isn’t producing like we have come to expect from a Mike Tomlin-led team. So, Po gets two INTs. If White is back, make that three.

3.) Carson Wentz chokes

Carson Wentz will be sacked thrice and throw two INTs. What a lil bitch. (Not a Bills game prediction, but still important to note.)

4.) Gibby Davis is Back!

The inclement weather unfortunately meant that Davis was only targeted three time in last week’s game. Truly disheartening. It’s like we’ve all forgotten what Davis even looks, sounds, and smells like. Is he even still on this team!? We need to know!

So, Allen will target our main man a minimum of eight times and, just to show us that Davis is still on the Bills, he’ll even get a TD.

5.) The Voice: Locker Room Edition

We all saw how well the Buffalo Bills sing on IG live. It was incredibly entertaining. And the Bills won’t stop that train.

I predict we’ll see Tyler Bass crowned the winner this week with a truly haunting rendition of “Pony” by Ginuwine, along with some sweet dance moves. Maybe this will be in my head or maybe it’ll be plastered on the internet for all eternity. One thing is for certain, it will happen.

Final

Bills Win, duh. An afternoon home game, when fans will be tailgating all weekend? The Bills will not disappoint.

Featured Image: Trish Patel